Our book club discussed Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner, singer and guitarist of Japanese Breakfast. Crying in H Mart is a memoir about a mother-daughter relationship with Korean culture, especially Korean food, being the thread that ties the stories and memories together.
I postponed reading the book until the very last minute because of the premise ━ a dead mother. It’s not something my brain could easily process, but I am glad I pushed through for the book club and managed to start and finish it on a Sunday afternoon.
I enjoyed it thoroughly and rated it 6 out of 7 for the book club. The majority of the members rated it as high as well. Why? Though not exactly in the same ways, most of us can relate to Michelle’s stories.
Crying in H Mart, and I
Me? I am an immigrant and an only child, like Michelle. And I, too, had a difficult relationship with my brown mother as a teenager ━ a pretty common theme in different settings.
Then there were parts about the family, the love, the culture and the food.
Crying in H Mart transported me back to Korea. From the food we had in the markets and restaurants to the culture, we observed there.
The part where she laid down on the bed with her dying mother and her mother’s friend ━ all three of them with face masks on, taught me a more profound empathy for the beauty obsession in Korea.
Then there are a few parts of the book that made me feel good when I recognised the cultural significance behind a few things she mentioned in passing, like eating Miyeok-guk, seaweed soup, on your birthday to honour your mother in Korean culture.
I appreciated her describing her Halmoni’s apartment in Gangnam, as I had wondered about the same when passing through the many tall-rise housing buildings in Seoul.
I also reread the paragraph where her mom told her not to fall in love with someone who doesn’t like kimchi:
“They’ll always smell it on you, seeing through your pores”. Her own way of saying, “You are what you eat.”
It made me smile because her kimchi is my garlic. I grew up in a garlic-loving household, we ate garlic, preserved garlic, as snacks ━ not unlike in Korean culture. Meanwhile, Fafa absolutely despised the smell of it. Oh well, let’s just say I am glad I didn’t read the book before marrying him.
H Mart The Australian Version
Her description of H Mart reminded me so much of the Korean shopping complex I went to with Jik in Eastwood, Sydney. It felt like I had seen similar things she described H Mart in her memoir ━ except for the part about going to Korean Spa and getting a scrub from an Ajumma. However, I also understand her special connection to H Mart. I, too, felt the same comfort when I walked around Harvest, the Indonesian grocery store I used to detour to before returning to our apartment in South Yarra.
Crying in H Mart The Book
Crying in H Mart was beautifully written ━ I am envious of Michelle’s multi-talents. And as described by Laura, my book club friend, not too wordy.
I still can’t believe it was published in 2021, felt like I had seen the book cover in Singapore Kinokuniya pre-covid. Speaking of, though you shouldn’t judge a book by the cover, the one thing the book club members agreed on was how we all loved the cover.
I also appreciate the discussion questions at the end of the Kindle version, which I used as a cheat sheet during the book club discussion.
You should read Crying in H Mart. It might be weird to call a death mother memoir inspiring, but I can’t think of a better way to describe it. It will inspire you to reach out to your loved ones, travel, or expand your cultural palate through Korean food.
Meanwhile, I am currently hunting for the next Korean lit to sink my teeth in, which I learned is not as available as Indian or Japanese lit. Why is that? But more importantly, I’d love some recommendations.
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